biogesic works

i like myself a lot.

i mean that in the full knowledge that i suck at some things, and am great at others. i mean that in the full recognition that though i grew up thinking i am ms. universe (lol), i am ms. me and that's enough.

i mean that on the occasions when i meet some fab person, and say, oh she's such a great person, i wish i were like her. and then i remember that after all, i am me, and i like myself a lot. and then i say, yes, she can be she, and i can be me, and perhaps we can get to know and like each other more.

and i mean that on meeting the uncertain in every day. and i give up and say, well uncertain, there's no way i can solve you or change you right now, so i'll just continue on being me, and see how you and i are ten minutes from now or tomorrow or next year.

and when i don't like myself, i know that i like myself enough to do the things that can make me fully like myself again.

*v*v*v*v*v

one of the things that upset me about my readings aside from their length and number (no, i don't really get upset about that), is when i read that blank is a predictor for blank. or that blank is not a predictor for blank.

such as personality is a predictor for marital happiness, or responsiveness is a predictor for growth-nurturing parenting is a predictor for nurturing, balanced personality (is a predictor for marital happiness, there you go :D).

because while i appreciate learning what works, and what's good, i get upset at the formulas this implies -- that we must be this and this and this to get this and this and this effect or become this and this and this.

because life is complicated, and i would rather know what can possibly be done today to make people feel better, and have hope, and grow and heal :) because few can fit into the formula, and even then, things can go wrong.

i get bothered by the defeatist and the defaulting. (although compulsive do-good-ing is not a good thing, as most compulsions cover up other troubles :D)

so i guess that's why i'm in this counseling course. i want to know what can be done with the way things are :)

*v*v*v*v*v

which is not to say that we need to be other people in order to be better people. as my wednesday teacher said, the greatest sin of psychology is to make people think they have to be better. that they have to constantly improve themselves.

when they are already all that they should be. when the thing to do is not to change or improve themselves but to heal.

like when joannie mentioned this quote from if the buddha dated. that it's not to change but to unmask one's self.

and i say, and to be healed.