home thoughts from athome

i never work on Saturday evenings because by that time i've really have had quite enough of anything that can be called work, and all i have time for by then is a little play.

so no matter if i still have a paper or two or three that needs doing, i lay off it on Saturday nights because by then i've had an afternoon of facilitating a group therapy session; days and days of work for classes and practicum, and preparing for the session.

i'm not run ragged :D (i don't know how to do that). i'm just full. very full, super full. such that when the top reaches the end of the line, it spins another dance. by itself.

and tomorrow is another day.

* * * *

things am happy about.

1. that our project is good enough.
it's not the best. it's not like brilliant, about to-eclipse-all-other-projects-for-a mega-million-sems-to-come great, but it's well worth the effort. interesting for the experience, good for the practice, not the best context for therapy but now i know that for myself. hihi.

you don't know how liberating that is. that not everything has to be so earth-shattering. i think well worth the effort is very good for me for now.

2. and my bestest talent is still, understanding and putting it all into words. what i liked about my last practicum site was being trained to have support for all of my words. mwehehehe. you know not go off into strange paths just following your vocabulary.

* * *

I could be a millionaire if I had the money
I could own a mansion, no I don't think I'd like that
But I might write a song that makes you laugh, now that would be funny
And you could tell your friends in England you'd like that
But now I've chosen aeroplanes and boats to come between us
And a line or two on paper wouldn't go amiss
How is Worcestershire? Is it still the same between us?
Do you still use television to send you fast asleep?
Can you last another week? Does the cistern still leak?
Or have you found a man to mend it?
Oh, and by the way, how's your broken heart?
Is that mended too? I miss you
I miss you, I really do.

I've been reading Browning, Keats and William Wordsworth
And they all seem to be saying the same thing for me
Well I like the words they use, and I like the way they use them
You know, Home Thoughts From Abroad is such a beautiful poem
And I know how Robert Browning must have felt
'Cause I'm feeling the same way about you
Wondering what you're doing and if you need some help
Do I still occupy your mind? Am I being so unkind?
Do you find it very lonely, or have you found someone to laugh with?
Oh, and by the way, are you laughing now?
'Cause I'm not, I miss you
I miss you, I really do.

I really do.

Home Thoughts from Abroad by Clifford T. Ward

* * * *

oh, i don't know.

i found Music and Lyrics the type of movie i could watch again
and again, and find comfort in it.

and i can't say that about most movies.

i don't even have a crush on hugh grant.
i even think he felt too old.

just that his character seemed real.
was hers?

well, i'd watch it again on a sunny late aftrnoon.

Way back into love

I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need em again someday
I've been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind
All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
Oh oh oh

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's got to be something for my soul somewhere
I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not just somebody just to get me throught the night
I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end
There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration 
Not just another negotiation

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love

And if I open my heart to you
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that I'll be there for you in the end