Maldita rants

Disclaimer
Daily Reading for 06 OCTOBER 2004
Today you're in danger of behaving in an worrying, even violent way that those around you will have difficulty in understanding, V___. Under the influence of the Tower, there's a risk that impulsiveness may lead you to speak too plainly or abruptly. This may result in comments or conflict which you will find difficult to resolve.

Only inspired by Buddha's Piscean "How are you's" but entirely about everyone who asks that I don't care to answer because .... NO OFFENSE MEANT :p ... This is supposed to be a truthful comic post.


“How are you?” is a question with no answer. I dunno, another Capricorn friend almost dropped off his seat one time when I asked him that question, replying with “Where did that come from?” so maybe it’s a Capricorn thing (sneaky, suspicious and controlling like, “What?!? Just what do you mean by that?”)

Or it could be the vagueness of the question, the one hundred possible (and a million other) contexts for such a question expressed in three simple words. Instead, be clear. What are you referring to? Why are you asking? Are you asking with ulterior motives? LOL. Will I agree with your ulterior motives? Do you just want something from me? Are you actually looking to put me down? Am I paranoid?

Hahahaha (sounds weird I know but I’m coming from past experiences) I don’t want to have to figure it out myself so tell it to me straight. Racking my brains, I find “How are you’s” that are cool. Like when close gfs ask, I usually know what they’re really asking about similar to when I’m the one doing the asking, usually in reference to something specific – a bad mood, an awarding ceremony, the rain, coffee, a life-changing recent circumstance, a skirt far too long or for that matter, far too short.

Or in the case of another friend, it starts off our ritual for shooting the breeze. He asks, “How are you?” I go, “Talking with the birds about the bees.” He replies, “What’s wrong with humans?” I could go “They have too much hair.” Or whatever pops into our heads, providing of course that we have the time, the mood, and the text load to pass off the time so pleasantly. Chuckle chuckle. (Which reminds me, I still haven’t answered his last message: “I know you’re a feminist, but isn’t it wrong to stalk a man?”)

Or in the case of my mother who asks directly, "Are you ok?" so I know she wants reassurance that I'm ok. (Hehe, yes Ma, am ok.)

What are you “how are you-ing” me for? Typewritten, ten pages, double-spaced or Times New Roman, 12 points. Due by Friday.

And in the meantime, … so, how are you? (insert knowing look, smirk, mischievous smile, caring heart, vague persona, genuine curiosity or boredom as entirely appropriate.)

Hehehe!