Huhuhu, we moved :D :-P

We call it the house of bless.

Frankly I don’t know where to begin. It has been MAJOR. The house is wonderful but I am not yet at the point where I can say that I feel wonderful as well :D. I feel glimmer of the possibilities but for the most part I have been tired and stressed. I am sure I’ll feel the rewards in the years to come. But not now.

Actually I do feel better today :D. Still, roomie, the stressed soul assigned to oversee the work today, has been sending text messages every few minutes reminding me of just how stressful this whole thing has been, is. Hehehe. I hesitate to say this for fear of being said to be a drama queen, too complaining, grossly unappreciative or failing to enjoy the moment. Fax! All that may be true. Or not, since the moments have been telling me that I have been very stressed. And so I cannot help but stay stressed, in the moments. Hehehe!

But I guess what I just want to say is, this is not an easy task. And yet am not meaning that I don’t want to be in this position. Who wouldn’t? This is like a dream. Sitting in the big garage last night contemplating on the full moon, I savored the feeling of being in our own place. I realized it’s been such a looooong time since I’ve had that feeling, been in that situation where I was at our own place. Not since I graduated from high school all of eons ago.

Just that it’s difficult. Especially when there’s only one of me, and of roomie, and of our ate who helps clean and sort, and we have to deal with all this men who keep half-amused smiles on their faces thinking they’re only dealing with little girls. Thank goddess their biggest boss is a mother hen who can crack the whip if necessary. But am getting ahead of my story.

Here are some of the good and funny bits to take the edge away:

I love the kitchen/ dining area. I always thought this would be my least-liked room because it looked like it was going to be the least airy part of the house. But hey! It’s all right, and bright too. And with the tv in the other room, people in the dining room can’t help but concentrate on eating and talking with each other :-P. I like it so much, it even makes me feel like I want to start cooking! And I swear, I’ve never had that feeling before! Just the thought but not the feeling. Hahaha. Not that I want to announce that too much though because people might start expecting :-D Especially cooks I know.

Had to transport stuff five times in the last four weeks because if we didn’t do that, we couldn’t pack the rest still standing, that was how much stuff I had. There was nowhere to move in our previous apartment once we got seriously packing. But voila! Every time we transported stuff to the new place, it just ate up the stuff. I mean, it didn’t look in the least bit full at any point, that’s how spacious it is. Happy. It’s possible to breathe.

The space also means one has to take a walk just to get a glass of water! Hahahaha. This amuses me no end because I can really feel the difference, I really have to walk. In our old apartment it only took like twelve steps from the couch to the ref. Now, it’s like more more. Hehehe. I’ve never done so much walking and climbing just staying in one place. (Also because there’s no cellphone signal in the living room and I keep the phone half-way up the stairs so which means more stair time everytime my jazz sax text tone goes on.)

Then too, my former nemesis cable company came and reconnected our cable tv on the very day that we moved in. Hihihihi, how’s that for cable continuity! Three cheers for you!

By day two at new house, I had unpacked the coffeemaker. Extremely good news.

For the not so good stuff:

Armed and Dangerous
On Friday, after delivering a jeepney’s worth of stuff to the house, HB and I went to SM to pick up the aircon. It could not be delivered because I couldn’t say for sure when there would be someone to sign for it at the house, and I wanted it delivered just when it could be installed. On the way back, along this sidestreet with an urban poor community to one side, traffic stopped by three men (two in uniform) wielding machine guns! Moving about, shouting, wielding their guns menacingly as if they had just fired it and were about to fire again! HB and I were frightened they or whoever it was they were targeting would hop into the jeep and take off with us and my aircon in it. Or else surely if they fired we were very vulnerable as a jeep is a very open vehicle. Luckily when traffic moved, the jeepney sped thru. (All this time, I was pleading with the driver to back the jeep but he could not as traffic was also stopped behind us.)

Feeling Bratty
On Saturday, after three intense days of packing and moving and little sleep, I was my most-tired, at-the-end-of--tether self when we finally packed an elf truck full of the-last-of-it-all. At that point, I didn’t care if we just upped and left, nevermind our belongings. I only wanted the two pillows I had hung on to, dust mites and all. Actually, by then I just mostly stood or sat and pointed which went where. I had no more energy left to clean up and unpack. I mostly frowned and sighed and ordered food. I stress ate and frowned some more.

And the blank hit the fan :-P
Then too, could not really do much when we moved in because so many things still needed to be done that hampered the unpacking process ;-). Couldn’t jazz up my bathroom with this hole in the ceiling done to check out a leak. Couldn’t unpack my clothes because the closet needed extra rods. Worried about the aircon installation as the unit wasn’t draining. Could not replace the energy consuming light bulbs as that needed a ladder. Could not fix books because the bookshelf needed assembling. Could not store away half the kitchen stuff because the kitchen counter was still a shell.

It was all the more frustrating because the foreman with whom I was coordinating wasn’t sending on pertinent information. I had been counting on the fact that there would be people to work on the things that needed to be done that Friday afternoon, Saturday morning and first thing Monday. However, people had gone home to their province on Friday at lunch because of the typhoon. That’s fine, of course, but I only discovered that fact, wasn’t told of it, and spent the weekend in a stew wondering if they could work on Monday, my only free day left from the office. The foreman refused to reply to text messages. The list was long, the wait long, and the answers not forthcoming.

The foreman stopped by at 9 am on Monday and dropped off the kitchen cabinet doors. He left again and didn’t say for sure what was going to happen that day. Said he was looking for the plumber and the carpenter. I texted him the list that needed doing and asked if he could give me definite answers on people and times so I could at least feel reassured that something was going to happen since I had been waiting for information and results from him since Friday. He texted back after lunch, his message implying that I was some classist heartless bitch who could not understand that people needed to go home to their families because of the floods, and that if I needed anything I should just go next door where the workers were staying and ask for help.

His text message drove me to tears. I felt so wronged, I sobbed uncontrollably for an hour. I could not help it. First of all I’m not at all hard to please. I have always been direct and clear in communicating with these people. I simply wanted someone straightforward to work with on this house thing, particularly as it’s not easy. I hardly know anything about this, and Capricorn-like, if only I could --paint, drill, install aircons, locks, rods, heaters and so on and so forth -- I would. I wanted straightforward answers and information from him because he is the foreman, he’s the one in charge of the people who are working on the house. And in the first place, why do I have to go chasing after him for information and assistance as if I was the one who owed him, and needed to beg when we have paid for the house and the service as we should. The developer assured me of all assistance that I needed. In fact, I have been careful not to abuse this offer.

I asked the Mrs, the developer to intervene, telling her that I was having difficulties talking with her foreman. He arrived back after an hour, and I opened the gate, red-rimmed eyes and all, shaking from anger, and went into this huge screaming tirade telling him not treat me that way, and that I didn’t deserve insults when all I wanted was someone straightforward to talk to. Not someone who would just brush you aside, and leave you wondering, till you want to shoot him the next time you see him.

Fortunately, he apologized profusely, and after drinking glasses of water to calm me down, I told him to go ahead and have the men over to do the work. After another hour, the Engr., his boss, came and started inquiring about the things that needed doing. They were stood there planning, and setting deadlines, and I said wait a minute, you need to coordinate this with me, as you should have done, because no one is going to be in the house on some days. And in this macho overbearing I’m-a-man-and-I-can-do-this-you-need-not-worry-your-pea-brain-or-get-all-emotional way, he brushed aside my complaints about them not coordinating properly. Having had enough of his overbearing attitude from the day I first met him, I put my hand up to his face and said wait a minute, you have to listen to me. You can’t brush aside what I have to say about my experience with you all because these are valid concerns and I want them recognized.

I guess I hurt his pride, a little girl like me disrespecting an engineer like him coz he went storming up the stairs and commanding the foreman in this loud voice, "Ok finish this by Friday, we have to finish this by Friday (implying that they didn’t want to have anything to do with me by Friday.)"

By this time, it was getting funny. I put the engineer in a temper, hihihi :-P. So I waited for him to calm down while he commanded his men about, and then followed him upstairs where they were doing stuff. By then he had calmed down too, and we started talking calmly and straightforwardly about all the things that needed doing.

As we should have done from the start. If only they didn’t carry around this attitude with them that this little girl need not be taken so seriously!!!! Well @#*@ really!!!!

In the middle of the afternoon there were like 8 men swirling around the house doing many things simultaneously – fixing the aircon, doing the shelves, doing the leak, putting in bulbs. See what can get done if only people do their work as they should. And now I know who to talk to for each specific task.

Well hopefully, things settle down by the end of this week, and I can start beaming :-), not just wait for happiness to catch me unawares.

P.S. Incidentally, my horoscope this week says this about yesterday: On Monday there is a Full Moon in Pisces in the communications section of your chart. This is likely to blow one or two conversations out of all proportion, and facts may get lost in an emotional haze. The Full Moon is also in opposition to Mars, and this could mean that tempers become frayed if things aren't 'just so'. If you feel yourself getting annoyed, then be prepared to stand back and count to ten.

*GRIN.*

7 days later

I adore the new place, I do.

But in the meantime, I feel like I've just been thru the meat grinder, and I'm pork giniling [ground pork].

P.S. Why didn't my mobile post to flicker include the text? Anyone know? :-( Had to edit this, this am when I feel much better. :-)

I long

For Sunday when I won't care if the rest of the house is a mess, for as long as I can lie all day in my cool aircon room, empty of stuff save for me, a book, and my bed.

I will read the Josephine book until the very last page.

And if these lashings of rain should continue, I'll sit on the parquet floor and watch it lash away, as if Metro Manila were one big washing machine.

Wednesday

Torrents of rain.

Torrents of RAIN.

TORRENTS of rain.

Torrential rains.

TORRENTIAL RAINS.

MEGA TORRENTIAL RAINS

!!!!

(giggle)

askew but spinning

Something’s not quite right in my universe. It’s like when your Nokia cellphone batteries are old, and the indicator says it’s full but at the last minute, ooops, dead batt.

The Elusive Back Massage
Have been feeling the stress on my back in the last few days and dreamed of getting the ache kneaded away at the neighborhood salon, the only salon left around here that still does a full back, head and arm massage for a hot oil treatment.

Last night, no go. Had to wait for the boss to emerge from a meeting lasting well after dinner so I could discuss some matters with her. It’s also called the art of boss-ambush, now and then needing the sacrifice of a chance for a back massage. The non-ambush option meant more headaches later, so might as well.

Ahh, tonight. Another golden chance. Only to find out a few minutes before leaving for the salon that my boss went there to get a haircut herself. Quick! Cancel cancel! If life that moment were a browser I was hitting the back button repeatedly!

Don’t get me wrong. There’s nothing wrong with meeting the boss at the salon. :D In fact, it could be fun. But there are good days for such, and better days for such, and tonight was not the better day, in my humble opinion :D


Detour to the mall
Another salon.
Receptionist: Name please
Pansy: V______
Receptionist: With a B for Baboy or V for Victory?
Pansy: (Huh???! but recovers after a second) Victory.


Victory not

On with the hot oil.

Attentive Assistant: (asks several friendly questions to set up some chemistry between us)
Attentive Assistant: Oooh, are you pregnant?? (obviously noticing my belly bilbil buy-on puson tiyanich :-P)
Pansy: Err, no (smiles)
Attentive Heedless Assistant, still persisting in the warm niceties: Oooh, you just gave birth?
Pansy: (So sorry to disappoint this continuing to be heedless assistant) Err, no (smiles)

Sigh. Hahahaha. What to do. (laughing YM emoticon right here).

And I still didn’t get a back massage. :-( Just a head one.


Hihihihi. ... Ok, time to pack. I pack from 11 pm to 2 am daily. I have almost completely moved. My books – done. My butt – soon. My belly -- ditto.

Sanity and stuff

Fantasy1
Ahhh, it's but 1:30 pm on a Monday and I am a tired flower (LOL, how seedy that sounds).

I want to hide in the cabinet from the rest of the world. Maybe I can bring a reading lamp with me, and the Josephine B. book.

Fast forward thru time and space, and cash considerations: Me on a beach in my pumpkin bikini, glorious sunshine. SNOOZIN'.

Wahahahaha! This fantasy rocks.

Prelude to a looming post on labels
I was walking to the office yesterday (it never fails when I walk by myself I get to think) and I thought that, fortunately, each one of us is always a little mad.

And if I seem perhaps more sane than others a greater portion of the time, this is in fact, my particular version of crazy. So sane as to be mad. As to be me ;-).

Pink Pansy

You know those scenes in Sleeping Beauty where two fairy godmothers have a running argument on the color of Aurora's gown?

With magic wands,
One goes, "Pink!"
The other, "Blue!"
And then back to "Pink!"
Then, "Blue!"

And so on and so forth, while Aurora is twirled around the dance floor by a Prince Charming.

Currently, I am Pink!

I didn't plan on it. I didn't expect it to happen. I used to be BLUE - in all sorts of shades. But now, am somehow always some kind of pink. Not all, but some, sometimes straight thru all the weekdays.

Song break

Working late at the office tonight, we could hear the office caretaker singing to the videoke channel downstairs. Priestess and I got jealous. Besides, Peepai brought up that poetic song Insensitive that's probably every girl's song at one or two or three points in her life.

So, a newly downloaded song later, peek at Peepai's site for the lyrics, and the volume turned up, we were singing along ...

Ending up with a partial astrological analysis of the lyrics!

How do you numb your skin, after the warmest touch? - Saggitarius line
How do you slow your blood, after the body rush? - Capricorn line
How do you free your soul, after you've found a friend? - Aquarius line
How do you teach your heart it's a crime to fall in love again? - Pisces line

All together now:
Oh you probably won't remember me
It's probably ancient history
I'm one of the chosen few
Who went ahead and fell for you
I'm out of vogue, I'm out of touch
I fell too fast, I feel too much
I thought that you might have, some advice to give
On how to be insensitive

sisterly love

miss_donna: sister!!! help
miss_donna: i get my exam results in less than an hour
miss_donna: SCARED
themundaneandthedivine: exam results of?
miss_donna: heh?
miss_donna: AS exams
miss_donna: half an a-level
themundaneandthedivine: hehe
themundaneandthedivine: sister
themundaneandthedivine: hug thyself
themundaneandthedivine: :-P
themundaneandthedivine: there's nothing we can do at this point except be happy
themundaneandthedivine: :-D
miss_donna: hmph.
miss_donna: jonny just rang me to tell me his
miss_donna: he got 2 B's, 2 C's and an E
themundaneandthedivine: so how come he got his first?!?@!
themundaneandthedivine: that's cheating!
miss_donna: he goes to a different school
miss_donna: he gets more than me
miss_donna: i only get 3!
miss_donna: he's already done his general studies (a load of crap in my opinion) and i only do 3 subjects instead of the normal 4
themundaneandthedivine: that's what i like about you sister
themundaneandthedivine: you're not normal
themundaneandthedivine: :-D
miss_donna: lol

Some Lessons on the Run

on currently one of Life’s More Major Agenda Items:

also

Sometimes it’s like we’re all still, and supposed to be, in kindergarten

1. It helps to hold each other’s hands.
2. It’s great to keep the hopeful face and the positive heart of the trusting child. We don’t know everything but we have faith that everything will work out, when it’s supposed to.
3. No single person has THE answer to the question or the problem. And yet paradoxically, the answer lies in each one and in all.
4. The Goddess helps those who help themselves. While there are no certain answers, we seek and traverse each path that seems the most loving at each time.
5. We each have our things to contribute and to share, each contribution not exactly the same as the others; some have more to give, but each gift is precious. Di ko kaya ang ginagawa niya pero ang mga kaya ko ay gagawin ko.

It has been liberating for me to know that I don’t know much, and I lend my support to those who know more than me, with the understanding that they don't know everything, either. We are just one in our love.

It has been ok to have been scared, to have been sad but in the end it has helped to surrender the outcome and yet have the faith that there is a bigger purpose to all of this, and to try and understand this purpose in our hearts at every step and turn.

It feels good to know that, damn, love always works! Love always begets love. Yong pagmamahal sa mga kaibigan at sa pamilya ay laging nagbubunga at bumabalik.

I am sorry to have to keep talking in riddles :-), and thus, end up sounding like one enormous cliché. But what I can do? It really is all that!

Those who know and understand will know and understand with their hearts of what I speak. Someday, this is going to be one long hearty chuckle, on an ocean of love, that is eternity.

I so ADORE

Kakapanggigil!!!!!! Galing-galing ni Jet Pangan and Agot Isidro sa Baby, the Musical!!!! Ang cute-cute!!!! Ang funny-funny!!! Bagay na bagay!!!!

Hehehehehe!!! Fan!!!!

By some stroke of good luck (thanks roomie and friends of roomie!), we got to see the full dress and technical rehearsal of Baby the musical last night. What fun!

Some of my favorite lines, phrases by the Lea Salonga character:
"...Marriage is an anti-social act."
"It turns talented men into husbands, and brilliant women into wives."
"...your disposition, and my inner beauty."

One of my favorite songs in it is, What does it matter that I love you? (ahem hehe!)

Of course, Lea Salonga is Lea Salonga. And Gerard Salonga is Gerard Salonga (very entertaining to watch him conduct). And the cast is great; the sound system, though, needs some more tweaking.

But really, Jet (!!! SIGH !!) and Agot stole the show!!!

They spent many minutes under the duvet together while scenes were played out in other parts of the stage. Huhuhuhu!

Text galore

Don't you agree sometimes that texting is like a full-time occupation?! There are days in the office when it seems like all I've done all day is text (for work)! My poor mouse-and-text hand. A thousand messages. Communication.

Those I cannot text, I heart you. ;-)

Capricorn, Aug. 15

Having a healthy sex life can be tremendously healing and therapeutic. That's why you need to take account of your sensual desires, even if you've been raised to ignore them. Give yourself permission to have lustful thoughts and feelings. These sentiments are a profound source of personal power. Your mate will be happy to indulge your need for physical intimacy. If you're single, look for a love interest who is comfortable in their skin.

Hehehehe!

Doing the Deed

Image230
Originally uploaded by Pansy.

And this is how I ended my three-day stint as an ultra-rich pansy. Hehehe!

CONGRATULATIONS, Everyone!!! There you go Mumsicle!! ;-) The deed is done! We have a house :D.

MWAH!

Blueberry Crepe

Image213
Originally uploaded by Pansy.

HEAVEN ON EARTH, Philippines, Metro Manila, Quezon City, Cafe Breton.

HEHEHE.

See the Priestess taking pic with her phone ;-)

Tonight, it's the singing, not the song ;-)

Love, love will keep us together
Think of me babe whenever
Some sweet talkin' girl comes along, singin' a song
Don't mess around, you just gotta be strong

You better stop (stop) cause I really love you (really love you)
Stop (stop) I been thinkin' of you (been thinkin' of you)
Look in my heart and let love keep us together
Whatever (a-ba-da whatever)
I will (ever), I will (ever), I will (ever), I will (ahh)

Clapping and whistling

(Da da da da, da da da da, da da da da)
(Da da da da, da da da da, da da da da)

Love will keep us together
Captain and Tennille

Wala lang, my life as an echo, and a visit from the goddess

How can I not but be an echo, echo, echo, surrounded as I am with witches and priestesses, and goddesses, (and samurais even), enveloped as I am in their eternal love, and ageless wisdom? Love and wisdom is in the air that we breathe, the water that we drink and the food that we partake of. ;-)

Hence, my life as an echo, echo, echo. I tend to repeat repeat repeat the things that I imbibe and understand in my efforts to practice love :-D

So I think that at any given moment, we are always faced with two choices, to go with fear or live in love. It is always a present choice, a choice with consequences rippling in ever widening circles, -- giving love now leading the way to giving more love later, and so on and so forth.

Pagmamahal was never easy, but it is so much easier than living in fear.

Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind!!!!!!!!!

Remember to open your eyes!!! ;-)

I should like! ;-)

I should like very much to glide down Maginoo St., in a paperboat, on the way to work. It was raining so hard. I wouldn't want to miss work because of rain. I like the people.

I should like to walk up the street, when it's cool and quiet after an afternoon of raining so much, to grab an adobo pan de sal with DD, to talk things over, but not too much. Some things can do with a little less talking over. (DD probably agrees.)

I should like to stop knitting my brows when so many people want so many things of me. Work things. I only want to put the phone down and say "Ssssshhh." (Still, I attend to the things they need when I've taken the time to unfurl my forehead.)

I should like to dab a large spot of avocado green paint on his nose just because I can.

I should like to wave my magic wand over roomie so she'll feel better enough to stand on the deck of SM Baguio (the best SM in the world, sigh) and admire the magnificent view.

I should like does not seem grammatical at all but I should like to make it so :-P (should, meaning I should because I feel like it; like because I like; I should like ;-) ). I should like to twist language to suit me.

Strange Trivia

1. How many pairs of shoes do I keep/ have in my office room? (It was spontaneous. They prefer it here than in my stuffed shoe cabinet.)
2. How many nights in a row have I had beef dinuguan at that airy resto up the road? (It's real good :D).

errr, that's all for now.

new things over, around and about me

1. read that at the time of Josephine Bonaparte, a book cautioned against exposing girls who were getting their periods to "spicy foods or to music in an immoral key"
2. a newfound instinct for incense
2. burn your fears in the fire of your love :-)
3. comb your hair to soothe your spirit
4. sway to the sound of your soul singing (hehe i like the alliteration)

7 things to tell from my cup of coffee

Image206
Originally uploaded by Pansy.

1. I like my coffee strong and sweet.
2. I like coffee.
3. I like to think am strong and sweet :D.
4. Aqua is my now favorite color (and pink :-P).
5. I was once a pansy, a crystal ball reader said, and I am fixated on the idea :-P (obviously)
6. I imagine our attic in the colors of my cup.
7. I tend to get distracted at longish meetings.
8. (In the style of Imelda who starts with 7 and ends up with more) I like to sit beside DD -- whose notebook that is -- at meetings because she's interesting to sit beside with :-P (it saves on text messages).
9. And as much as I like to be silent, I also like to blog about nothing much :-P