do you believe that we actually have everything that we need? or we have the means to find it :))))))??

the other day, my sister texted saying that she wants to go do, but what?! she doesn't know yet. so i told her to ask before she sleeps, and in her dreams she might find some answers. and she did just that and the next day messaged me about two things that she dreamt about :) and these were stuff that she was worried about, but might not have acknowledged properly to herself that she did.

&&&&&&&&&&

sa tingin ko, malaki ang panahon na nabibigay ko sa paghahanap ng magandang puwesto. halimbawa, kanina nakaupo ako kaharap ang bintana. pagkatapos ng isang oras, natanggap ko na rin na nasisilawan talaga ako so lumipat na ako. sideways naman. hehe.

&&&&&&&&&

may exam ako bukas. final exam. ganito ang plano ko: magpagupit ng buhok. oo, gusto ko magpagupit ng buhok dahil mahaba na ang hair. haha.

&&&&&&&&

nakakatawa ako. gusto kong gumala. last week pa ako gala ng gala. di ako mapakali na di lumabas. daming energy, di kaya ng space. gusto ko lang maglakad at gusto ko ng maraming nakikita.

mag-aaral ako sa labas.

&&&&&&&

good luck po dun sa mga gumagawa ng sarsu. mag-enjoy kayo ;)

back from the 5th young men's camp

Magagawa natin
ang lahat ng bagay



ang lahat ng bagay sa mundo ...




ang iilang bagay,
di magagawa




di magagawang nag-iisa.



malulutas natin ang mga problema



kung tayo'y nagkakaisa...

natutuwa ako dahil kaya ko na mag-training na ako ang magdadala. di na ako natatakot at alam ko na ang gusto kong sabihin :) ... at kung may nakakalimutan ako, hinahabol ko na lang, hehehe.

(di ko pa rin naiwasan magalit sa isang punto, hay naku. sana, di na maulit ;)) dahil masama yata ang trainor na nagagalit sa mga trainees.)

natutuwa ako dahil masaya makasama ang maraming kaibigan sa isang proyekto na lubos na mahalaga at makabuluhan.

natutuwa ako dahil sobrang receptive ang mga bata, at marami sa kanila ang nagsabing gusto na talaga nilang magbago.

nakakatuwa panoorin ang kaisipan at kamalayan na nagbubukas.

naniniwala ako na nagiging attached ang mga bata sa isa't-isa, at nagiging memorable ang camp sa kanila, dahil pinayagan nila ang kanilang mga sarili na magbukas at ma-appreciate ang kayamanan na dala ng karanasan sa Camp.

being is its own reward :)

here's to men and women, good souls, open spirits,
at home and at one in their mind, body, soul,

magagawa natin ang lahat ng bagay sa mundo.

dreamworks pictures

hulaan mo kung sinong napanaginipan ko?

siguro iniisip niya ako ;)). siguro iniisip nila ako.

hahaha.

lagot ako kung iniisip nga nila ako at bigla nilang sabihin.

tanungin ko kaya, pssst, huy inisip mo ko no? inisip niyo ko no?

***

gusto kong matulog kahit kaunting oras lang.
nakakataba ang walang tulog.
nakakagaan ang tamang tulog.

Duma

ewan ko ba Maria kung bakit, nakakahawa yata ang hiwalayan.

dahil sa pagkasira ng tambalang HB-Jonas, magkakahiwalay na rin kami ng aking partner na si Kuya Ge.

magkakaroon ng mga bagong pagsasama. Si HB na at si Kuya Ge (a dash of Diego in the land of Rizal) at ako naman at ang di ko maalala kahit anong dukdok ko ng kukote ko sa dingding na si B.

tanong ko nga, maliliwanagan kaya ang mga kabataang Diego? ano ang sabi ng bolang bilog?

***

Duma daan lang.
Duma ranas ng matinding ambisyon (ma perfect ko kaya ang last exam?)
Duma ko roon.

Papuntang Duma guete.

Kitakits!

;)

the upshot

actually, there's probably not a lot that we cannot do
if we do them together
if we take the time to do these together
if we take the time to do these lovingly, together.

like taking the time to kindly teach the cab driver
to get from point A to point B
because he doesn't know and asked.

or taking the time to listen to each other.

there's more that i want to do with more people now.

and an enlarged head

but the thing is,

the second i roll my eyes

at the cloud

i know there is an expanse

of sky behind it

and beside it

expanding in all directions.

and the cloud is,

let me put it this way ...

what's with the cloud

in the face of

limitless sky?

with furrowed brow

there's a cloud:

it begs my acceptance.

till then,

it won't go away.

(cloud, go away.

all right.

be there.

i'll carry on folding clothes.)

Sex vs. Politics

This is where my problems revolve these days. I am forced to choose between Sex and Politics: It has gotten so that one of the great main pleasures of the hot part of May has been to settle in the middle of my huge queen bed (with its bright striped sheets, the one with comic memories), with the aircon on, and dim lights and settle down to slowly but surely work my way thru the entire set of Sex and the City DVDs, and/or the West Wing set borrowed from HB.

(I tell you, it is a delightful alternative to melting in the heat.)

But no, 12 episodes of SATC and 8 episodes of the West Wing, later, I come to a crossroad. SATC or West Wing? The UK or the US?

Fiolo's DVD drive screams stop to bilocality. It appears I have almost run out of choices as to the region of the world from which the DVD player can play original DVDs. You can only change the location setting a number of times and then forever be stuck with such region of the world! Ahhh, the travails of original DVDs! My SATC set is from the UK and West Wing was purchased in the US. See, see!?!? Why not buy pirated that can come from a person with no visible address, and be free of hassles? And I still have 11 DVDs to go thru sex-wise.

Still, speaking about the West Wing. Oh, it's so heartwarming, the antics of those fictional Democrats at the White House :D. What's heartwarming is the love and friendship between the brilliant men and women of the staff of US President Martin Sheen. Like Deputy Chief of Staff Josh going nuts because he's the only one among the staff given the card that tells him where to go (bunker or Air Force One) in the event of a nuclear attack. He can't take it. Or the US President assuring his speechwriter, the amazing bearded Toby, that he would be in the weeds without him, and thank God, he's his speechwriter ('twas a case of the speechwriter needing love and affirmation ... as we all do now and then, spirit-humans, as we all do :D).

I also love how they gimik together -- basketball, poker, dinner, and the US president cheats baldly and boldly on his irate staff :D It's most loving :D. Hahahaha.

Where politics leads me to love and friendship, I guess I am not too much at a disadvantage.

And besides, I can always watch SATC downstairs ... even if all the Aquarians are almost done with it ;)))

Trivia: Aquarians have this habit of gathering in front of the DVD player during my parties and watching all night long. Most strange of this airy creatures. But does that mean tv is more exciting than my parties?! Even when I myself provide the entertainment by inviting everyone over, and crying my eyes out in front of them? Mwehehehe. Life is so strange and nice.

magical light*

haaaay :)

ewan ko ba. tuwang tuwa talaga ako sa mga pics namin ni vika sa laiya. ang ganda kasi ng lugar. napapailing na lang ako sa tuwing tinitingnan ko ang mga pics. ang ganda kasi ng mga kahoy. ang ganda ng tanawin.

ang ganda ganda ganda ganda ng dagat. ang galing galing ni vika. hawak hawak niya ang camera noong napansin niya na parang nakapaloob kami at ang karagatan sa "magical light"*. na kahit anong kuhanin mong picture ay maganda ang labas at ang sinumang nasa picture ay umaapaw lamang sa kagandahan.

tuwang tuwa pa ko kay vika kasi di siya nakakaconscious na kasama sa picture-picture. basta na lamang niya kukunin ang camera at mag picture ng gusto niyang picture-an laluna kung sa tingin niya ay nasa mgandang anggulo ang puwesto mo.

(sinimulan pero di natapos)

***

tapos, nakakaaliw din kung paano nakakakilig talaga ang aming mga picture. 'yong picture. 'yong picture, 'yong picture ang nakakakilig. haaaay, weird but true.

*hahaha, kakatawa kasi ang kapatid kong babae. pinagtawanan ang pag-ecstacies ko over "magical light." hahaha.

good things, great things, fab summer

my winning text exchange of the day:

moi to brother in province: i persuaded dad to bring you gonuts donuts
brother: well done, sister. :)

:D:D:D

***

I am excited.

The next young men's camp is coming soon!

And more of my favorite people are going!

Woohooo!

There'll be swimming pools and one with sulfur mud (lol, is that good?)!

And I'll have company flying back to Manila!

Wooshoo!

****

Then yesterday,

my knees trembled as I

was handed my long exam booklet

wherein I thought I might have failed.

But no,

I got an A.

:D

I take my blessings,

when and where they come.

*****

Plus, I want to thank HB for
inviting us to the creative movement
workshop we had yesterday which was

Simply FABULOUS!

Even if I will never be able to dance hiphop,
so what, I am the star dancer in the
dance stage of

MY LIFE

;)))

****

And I want to say

You're Welcome to the
"chakra cuties"
who are thanking me
for coordinating the
get-togethers.

It's my pleasure, pramis.

I am just glad to
have gotten to know you.

********

THANK YOU

FOR EVERYTHING.

***

Love, peace, and

sufur mud.

:P

Laiya2: looking up at

the moon and katig

Laiya 1: some enchanting trees

enamoured with those enchanting trees




trotting off to a tree


talking in earnest


sitting with the tree


tree camouflage



sun, sea, tree


the lovely leaves

lessons in love/ baby talk

on the way to Greenhills to meet fair Arwen of Lothlorien (hahaha super palagpat)... err Manhattan ...

Aemon: Sinong baby mo ninang vivi?
Ninang VV: Si Ninang Vivi!
Aemon: (chuckles) si baby Ninang Vivi!

Ninang VV: Sinong baby ni Ninang DD?
Ninang VV: Si A____t!

Ninang VV: Sinong baby ni Ninang Rd?
Ninang VV: Si ______g!

Aemon: Papasabugin ko ang bahay mo Ninang Vivi!
Ninang VV: Ha?!?! Huwag!!!
Aemon: (chuckles) Baby ni Ninang Vivi si baby Ninang Vivi!

p.s. woe to me. might get sued by Aemon's parents for taking remarks out of context and not in order :D

Peace, love and babies (not mine)! :D

One day, isang araw

"Do you remember? On the 21st night of September? Love was chasing the night away," todo kanta ng banda sa stage sabay umaalog din ang lechon kawali sa loob ng tiyan ko. Di mapigilang sumayaw sayaw habang nakaupo at masyadong inviting ang kanta. Paborito ko yata dati yon. Anong kanta yan? Tanong ng kaibigan kong mas bata sa akin na di inabutan ang jazz classic/period theme song ko at ng aking mga cohorts (natutunan namin sa Psychology class na cohort ang technical term sa mga kasabayan mo ng henerasyon). September ng Earth, Wind and Fire, sagot ko naman agad, natutuwang maishare ang paboritong kanta. Enjoy kami sa Baywalk. Napaupo kami noong nagsimulang kumanta ang banda ng mga ka emote emote na kanta. Mood ko kasi ang pakinggan ang mga senti songs na senti without being OA. Kumbaga, senti-classic. Tapos bait pa ng waiter. Natutuwa siyang sabihin kung ano ang specialty ng restaurant nila, isang never ko pa na heard pero kahelera ng iba pang chains dito sa Baywalk. Gyozan sabi niya, dumplings daw iyon. Masarap din ang kanilang lechon kawali. Tig-isa kaming san mig lite ng kaibigan ko. Tig-isa ding rice. Tig-isang tubig. Aba solb. Ang saya.

Ewan ko ba at trip ko lang lumabas at maiba ng eksena sa nakasanayan. Naisip kong sayang naman ang maghapong walang urgent para lamang maglinis. Naghanap ako ng kaibigang puwede mayakag pumuntang malayo at di kailangang gumastos ng malaki. Trip lang. Hinabol namin sana ang sunset pero trapik at maraming nagsisimba sa Quiapo. Ok lang, inabutan namin ang komunistang moon. Upo muna kami doon sa seawall kasama ang sangkatutak na Pilipinong mahilig din mag liwaliw. Ang saya. Tabi tabi kami doon sa seawall, isang napakaromantikong eksena lalo na’t di halata sa gabi ang dumi ng Manila Bay at ng Roxas Boulevard. Basta masaya lang. Umupo kami magkaharap at nagkuwentuhan. Nagtawanan. Dalawang linggo lang ang nakaraan mula noong huli naming gala pero napakadami na ng pangyayari. Nag-iyakan ng kaunti, tawanan na muli. Matapos bumili ng isang rosas sa isang batang babae at natawa sa eksenang para kaming magkarelasyon na lesbiyan, naglakad lakad kami muli at napaupo nga kami doon sa unknown restaurant. Doon doon kami mismo sa mesa kung saan nagtatagpo ang malamig lamig na hangin mula sa dagat at ang mainit init na hangin mula sa makeshift kitchen ng restaurant. Mga elemento na nakakapaglikha ng kidlat at kulog.

Nguya nguya, kanta kanta, malagkit na mainit na masaya. Ganito siguro ang gustong-gustong feeling ni Bryan sa kanyang pakikisalamuha sa mga kapamilya’t kapuso. Wala lang, Pinoy na Pinoy, may musika, beer, pagkain, kaibigan. Madali naman maintindihan. Ginagaya ko yata ang aking kinagigiliwan. Di bale di naman bawal ang panggagaya. Ganyan din minsan ang nagagawa ng pagmamahal. Tila nagkakapalit-palit ng mukha at hilig.